Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read. Want to Read saving…. Want to Read Currently Reading Read. Refresh and try again. Open Preview See a Problem?
View all 6 comments. OK here's the thing - Andy Stanley just really gets under my skin. Everything he talks about just seems to be him saying "What you know is wrong. What I know is right. And I'm going to change your life by telling you this. As for this book - good stuff. Everyone can get at least something from it I'm sure. And the whole "becoming the rig OK here's the thing - Andy Stanley just really gets under my skin. And the whole "becoming the right person" is good advice, I'm just not sure the motivation for becoming a better person ought to be to find a spouse.
As for me, well, I already held all of the beliefs expressed in this book. And to have everything presented as "you don't know about any of this, let me reveal to you the secrets of good relationships" just didn't fly with me, since I've grown up knowing all this.
That's not to say the ideas presented in this book are bad, like I said I already hold them. It's just the way they're presented seemed a little condescending. Do I recommend this book? There's some good stuff in it. Do I think it'll drastically change your view of relationships?
It didn't for me, but then again I'm an oddity. Jul 26, Josh Stowers rated it it was ok. A couple of positives: Really great wisdom for a De-christianized nation. Anyone that follows his advice will be relationally successful. The only thing I can say is new about this book is its ability to talk about C A couple of positives: The only thing I can say is new about this book is its ability to talk about Christian sexuality while stripping it of its purpose and power.The Right Person Myth - Andy Stanley
It strips its purpose by directing the only meaning of marriage as being temporally beneficial but not God glorifying. This is painfully obvious. I am not saying that Andy does not believe the things he does not mention. However he does not take this approach with churches.
He suggest to find the biggest church in your area and it just has to be big for a good reason. Pragmatism will lead people to a form of godliness that not only denies his power but his deserved glory. Obviously, the content is similar to the sermon series he does, but it expands areas that needed expanding. Stanley is very forthright and blunt which I found both helpful and intimidating.
He does not sugar coat anything. He is a good communicator as is clear if you have listened to him speak , he uses language that is easy to understand - he is direct. Could not recommend this book highly enough to single people, but also would recommend welpppppppppppppp wish I read this when I was about Could not recommend this book highly enough to single people, but also would recommend it to anyone for it's take on 1 Corinthians 13 and how to apply that to real life.
Sep 01, Vernita Naylor rated it it was amazing Shelves: Are these words interconnected in any way or do they stand alone in your mind? Pastor Andy Stanley of the Atlanta based North Point Ministries provides a candid approach on how to effectively date. Dec 17, Caitlin Dean rated it did not like it.
The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating
I got about three chapters in and I'm giving up. There's something about this book that is really bothering me. I think it's his tone of voice through his lectures. I was already wary reading a Christian based book on dating, when I myself don't align with a lot of Christian values.
And I couldn't shake his patriarchal "Father knows best" tone of voice. Maybe it's just not the right time in my life to read this book. Jan 17, Judy Bell rated it it was amazing. This book stretched me. I wish someone had given me this book years ago. Before I got married..
New rules for love sex and dating
I'm going to pass this book on to all my friends. Thanks Andy for writing a message that gets to the heart of matters. I needed some hard truth. Sep 14, Maui Rochell rated it really liked it Shelves: A good but not-so-recommended read if you're not matured enough to take it. Nowadays, many of us are not taught how to handle relationships properly. We just dive into it, secretly hoping things will be alright in the process.
And so most of us, leave those relationships with broken heart and wounded souls. Is it always supposed to be like that? This book is a good guide and an eye-opener. Feb 03, Bailey Hunter rated it it was amazing.
Anyone in any relationship, newly out of one or feeling ready to tackle Tinder should take the time to read this incredibly fast and eye opening book. Invest in the person you are or desire to be versus the person you think you need or want Most eye opening line: We all have one of a million. Dec 26, Shreeram Bhattarai rated it liked it. The book was written properly but lacking the factor which keeps you engaging with the books. There was only one main idea which is being the person what you are looking for.
I like the concept of preserving the sex for the marriage for better relationship as I am doing the same. Overall the book is well structured and well written. Many thanks to author for sharing your ideas and views. Dec 24, Rachel rated it liked it Shelves: I would give this book 3. It gave me a better perspective on dating as well as how to approach dating. I learned that while it is important to have standards it is more important to become the right person.
I thoroughly enjoyed this book and would recommend it whether you're single or in a relationship. Andy has a way of telling you, you want to change, without you realizing you want to. Love the way this book reminds us of truth through everyday language about sex and dating.
Was very helpful for a younger me. Very educational, in a good way! A must read for all but for teens especially. Right up there with Every Woman's Battle. Andy Stanly is not just entertaining and funny, he is engaging. I've learned so much! Jun 08, Nellie Coody rated it it was amazing Shelves: It was a fast-paced read, very to-the-point, and a must read for every person who's looking for love, falling in love, or hoping to fall in the love in the near future. Andy Stanley tells it like it is and his writing really makes you think.
Definitely a good read. Jan 09, Keri Grant rated it it was amazing. Fantastic book for young adults Jan 21, Joe rated it it was amazing Shelves: Wish I could have read as a High Achool student. I will pay my children to read this book. May 20, Justice rated it really liked it Shelves: Pretty quick and straight forward read, with valuable takeaways that can be put into practice. Aug 29, Kiersten Brown rated it it was amazing.
Great book to grow in emotional health. Aug 10, Jennifer rated it really liked it. Very interesting, although I don't agree with some of the points. I use this book with my therapy clients.
A helpful tool to help people understand why their relationships are ending in pain. It offers a thoughtful description of what marriage is. Andy Stanley is one of my favorites. Feb 21, Stephen Hiemstra rated it it was amazing.
Single or not, you will be glad you did. Some blame the pill; some blame the feminists; some blame the media. Whatever the reason, the irony is that the emotional and financial costs of broken relationships have never been higher.
But then Stanley then goes on to offer a rather rare insight: What I have discovered is that people with problems get married and their problems collide. This is getting down to brass tacks!
Instead of looking for that perfect person to solve all your problems, Stanley says—hey, look in the mirror! He describes himself as a communicator, author, and pastor and founder of North Point Ministries in Atlanta, Georgia. His book is written in 10 chapters, including: The Right Person Myth; 2.
The New Rules For Love Sex & Dating
Commitment is Overrated; 3. Becoming the Right Person; 4. The Way Forward; 8. Designer Sex; and If I were You These chapters are preceded by acknowledgments and an introduction. They are followed by conclusions, notes, and a small group discussion guide. A DVD video study is also available. This is a book filled with a lot of wisdom. One item on this list is patience: Love is patient 1 Cor Stanley notes that impatience is an emotion, not a decision, and it does not come naturally.
Stanley explains that love means deferring to someone else to set the pace—in time, space, and margin just as much as they need Stanley knows his audience. He starts this chapter by repeating a challenge that he made earlier: This is the hard sell part. Psychiatrists tell us that addictions are forever—abstinence is the only prescription that truly works. Bad habits take two weeks to break—bad sexual habits fall somewhere in-between. While this might sound like a high price to pay for moral clarity, but the life you save may be your own.
Stanley suggests that you spend this year proactively doing some important things to become the sort of person that the person you want to meet would find attractive. He has 5 suggestions: Address your past—face up to your issues; 2. Break some bad habits substance abuse, bad attitudes, poor fashion choices… ; 3. Set some standards—how far is too far? Go back to church—hang out in the right place Remember the mirror mentioned earlier? You cannot change someone else but you can work on becoming someone they might actually want to get to know.
This is not a preachy book, but it is an in-your-face book. Although my wife, Maryam, and I have been married for 30 years, I was already 30 when I got married. This implies that I was single for a long time. Save yourself a lot of pain. If this product is defective or a piece is missing, do not return to the place of purchase.
The part of "the talk" that was never talked about. From the myth about finding Mr. Right, through the true definition and design for love. Andy Stanley's straight talk approach will shatter your perceptions and preconceived notions about love, sex, and dating in today's world. Neither the husband nor the wife knew anything about relationships. Soon enough, their relationship problems began causing chemistry problems.
The sexual part of the marriage died, leaving both of them frustrated and confused. Separation and divorce followed. No one wants to watch a movie about a happily married couple. Think about some popular movies, TV shows, and songs about romance. Which of the rules do you agree with? Which ones do you disagree with? You need to become the right person.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Watch Session 1 Video Note anything that impacts you. How have you seen this way of thinking affect your relationships or those of your friends?
Read 1 Corinthians Which of the qualities mentioned is most difficult for you to exhibit? Which quality do you value most in the people you date?
Are the qualities in the two lists the same?